Alcohol and being mean


Many of us know somebody who becomes someone entirely different after a few too many drinks. This Jekyll and Hyde effect can make some people aggressive, nasty and unpredictable, leaving friends and family walking on eggshells around them.

But what is it about alcohol that causes this kind of transformation?

The science behind alcohol and aggression

To understand the link between alcohol and aggression, we need to look at how alcohol works on the brain. Alcohol is a depressant that affects the central nervous system. When you drink alcohol, especially in large amounts, it slows down brain function and impacts the areas responsible for impulse control, decision-making and social behaviour. These changes can lower your inhibitions, meaning you are more likely to act on impulses that you might usually suppress.

Alcohol also disrupts the balance of chemicals like serotonin, which helps regulate mood. When serotonin levels drop, it can cause feelings of frustration, irritation and anger, even if there is no real reason for it. As alcohol can also affect your judgement, this hyper-emotional state can make you more likely to lash out, say things you don’t mean, or even become physically violent, particularly if you feel like someone is challenging or provoking you.

Alcohol’s impact on personality

Alcohol’s impact on personality can vary a lot from person to person. Some people who are shy can feel liberated after drinking and become the life and soul of the party. This is why alcohol is often described as a “social lubricant”, helping to overcome shyness and social anxiety.

However, other people may become withdrawn, emotional or aggressive when they have had one too many. In some cases, people who experience alcohol-induced mean behaviour may usually be shy or find conflict difficult to handle when sober. Under the influence of alcohol, however, they may suddenly become confrontational or even aggressive.

This drastic shift in behaviour can be very confusing and distressing, both for the person themselves and those around them. It often leads to feelings of guilt and shame the next day, especially if they wake up unable to remember what happened, only to find out they have hurt those they care about.

Why alcohol makes some people more prone to aggression

Many people are able to enjoy alcohol relatively safely so why do some people experience alcohol-induced mean behaviour while others don’t? The answer lies in a combination of biological, psychological and social factors.

First of all, your genetics can play a surprisingly large role as studies have shown that certain people are more predisposed to aggressive behaviour when drinking. As mentioned above, this is potentially linked to how their brains respond to alcohol’s effects on serotonin and dopamine, the chemicals involved in mood regulation.

People who have unresolved emotional issues or are dealing with stress, anxiety or trauma may also be more likely to lose control when they drink.In these cases, alcohol can serve as a way to escape painful emotions temporarily, but once inhibitions are lowered, those feelings may resurface in the form of anger or aggression.

Social factors such as environment and past experiences with alcohol can also influence how someone behaves while drinking. People who have grown up around heavy drinking or who associate alcohol with aggression may be more likely to exhibit similar behaviours when they drink themselves. Sadly, this is often the case for children who have suffered alcohol-fuelled abuse from a parent. This can then create a similar environment for their own children, which can perpetuate the cycle of alcohol-induced mean behaviour across generations.

Alcohol addiction and binge drinking concept.

The consequences of mean behaviour whilst drunk

Mean behaviour when drinking can cause lasting harm to your most important relationships, whether it’s a hurtful comment made in the heat of the moment or more serious physical altercations. People under the influence may lash out at friends, family members or strangers and this can have long-term consequences, including potential legal problems.

In 2022/23 alone, there were an estimated 384,000 violent crimes where the offender was thought to have been drinking. Alcohol is also thought to fuel half of all cases of domestic violence.

It is also common for people to experience a breakdown in communication with their loved ones after repeated episodes of alcohol-induced mean behaviour. This can lead to isolation, loneliness and a worsening of their alcohol use, potentially leading to alcohol addiction.

Managing aggression while drinking

If alcohol tends to make you or someone you care about more aggressive, there are steps you can take to prevent or manage this behaviour. The first step is recognising that alcohol is contributing to the problem and acknowledging the harm that aggressive behaviour can cause. Once you have begun to notice a problem, here are some strategies for managing aggression while drinking:

Set limits on your drinking

Know your limits and stick to them. If you tend to become aggressive after a certain number of drinks, set a lower limit or stop drinking altogether.

Avoid triggering situations

If certain environments or people make you feel more aggressive, try to avoid drinking in those settings.

Alternate with non-alcoholic drinks

Pace yourself by alternating between alcoholic and non-alcoholic drinks to stay more in control of your behaviour.

Have a support system

Surround yourself with people who can help you stay in check and remove yourself from situations where you feel the aggression building.

Seek professional help

If managing your drinking on your own feels too difficult, seeking help from alcohol addiction experts like UKAT can make a big difference. We can help you understand what triggers your aggression and work with you to develop healthier coping mechanisms.

When is it time to seek help?

If alcohol-induced mean behaviour has become a recurring problem, it may be time to seek professional help. While it is “normal” to occasionally make mistakes while drinking, repeated episodes of aggression, especially if they lead to damaged relationships or legal trouble, may indicate a deeper issue.

Alcohol addiction can develop when drinking becomes a way to cope with everyday stress or deeper emotional issues that are troubling you. If you are finding it hard to control your drinking or if others have expressed concern about your behaviour while intoxicated, seeking professional support can help you break the cycle of aggressive behaviour and alcohol abuse.

UKAT offers a structured alcohol recovery programme that can provide the tools needed to address the emotional triggers and consequences of addiction. Contact us today, and we will discuss your situation and help you choose the right path forward.

(Click here to see works cited)

  • Drinkaware. “Alcohol Consumption UK: Consequences.” Drinkaware, https://www.drinkaware.co.uk/research/alcohol-facts-and-data/alcohol-consumption-uk-consequences. Accessed 10 September 2024.
  • Finlay, Baroness. “Alcohol Harm Commission: Report 2020 – Hansard.” Hansard, 22 April 2021, https://hansard.parliament.uk/lords/2021-04-22/debates/DC307679-EA51-43C7-B981-0B5F741427D2/AlcoholHarmCommissionReport2020. Accessed 10 September 2024.
  • Beck, Anne, and Andreas Heinz. “Alcohol-related aggression-social and neurobiological factors.” Deutsches Arzteblatt international vol. 110,42 (2013): 711-5. doi:10.3238/arztebl.2013.0711. Accessed 10 September 2024.
  • Sontate, Kajol V et al. “Alcohol, Aggression, and Violence: From Public Health to Neuroscience.” Frontiers in psychology vol. 12 699726. 20 Dec. 2021, doi:10.3389/fpsyg.2021.699726. Accessed 10 September 2024.
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